Mama Drama is normal and as natural as two people in love having the inevitable conflict it brings.
We’re not talking about that.
The desire to remove your emotional and/or physical presence from your birth mother is caused by MDT- Mama Drama Trauma, a condition in which the mother projects unhealed aspects of herself into her child causing emotional and/or physical trauma.
How to know when it’s time to deal with the toxic affects of MDT can be hard, but like Dorothy in ‘The Wizard of Oz’, we too are given ample opportunity to rid ourselves of it, and are lovingly guided through the process.
Toxins are generally dealt with in one of three ways: by denial, detox or dumping it. Denial allows it to fester, thus creating a generational curse or cycle of it. Detox, like healing, can become a perpetual process never quite ending due to constant exposure. To each their own path keeping in mind at some point the destructive flame must be doused. Finally, dumping, when careful and mindfully undertaken can enrich the soul.
When MDT begins to destroy you
Initially, we deny it. Admitting your mother is toxic to you living a happy, healthy and whole life is one thing, but drawing the conclusion you’ve been traumatized by this toxin is another. Yeah, my back hurts, I have fibroids, my hip hurts and I have headaches all the time but so does she. So what?
MDT is a cycle. If all you’ve ever known is a mixture of love shown by your material needs being met with a kind of emotional hate for being made to feel a burden, can be difficult to tell what’s really happening, especially if that is how she was raised. Truth is MDT is a planetary disorder because of denial. To speak, even think ill of the mother is universally taboo.
However, when she, either consciously or unconsciously starts to destroy you, it’s time for self inquiry to identify what you believe. It usually goes like this: Is it true I’m a burden? I must be. Everyone around me: family, school, church, etc. tells me everything she does is right, so regardless of how that makes me feel, I will honor her feelings above my own. I will deny my disassociation with my spirit, and by default give my power to her in exchange for her sacrifice to have and/or raise me.
When you are being destroyed by MDT
I refer to this stage as “detox”, it’s after we’ve come to terms with MDT and initiate our healing process. Dorothy’s yellow brick road serves as a useful analogy for MDT sufferers who detox our addictions through the anons (i.e. AlAnon, AAA, etc.), meditation, yoga, exercise, organic diet, life coaching, counseling, herbs, etc.
Each attempt to take back our power is met with layers and layers of MDT proof and opportunities for us to heal it by processing the grime into the blessing or lesson it is meant to be. This inner work requires a great deal of energy which is why a healthy lifestyle choice is a wise one for the true initiate of this path.
Remember, Dorothy had to get up from the poppy field which represents addictions before she could enter Emerald City, open her heart chakra to be healed. (Scroll to bottom to sign up for your Free eBook explaining MDT using ‘The Wizard of Oz’).
When your life is destroyed by MDT
As Dorothy began to see her own value reflected in her journey companions and her ability to get the broom (take her power back) from the Wicked Witch, she became whole, was healed and could see her adoptive family in Kansas as holy.
Loving detachment “dumps” emotional and physical toxicity by making you the gatekeeper of the extent to which abandoning and abusive words, attitudes and behaviors will be tolerated in your life. Cases in which the mother is unwilling, unable or unavailable to heal, loving detachment is necessary in order to live a happy, healthy and whole life. The codependency and tendency to procreate MDT in relationships dissolves for initiates brave enough to do so, at least for the time required to be unaffected by her.
Healing MDT is a lifetime journey because of the shift required to grieve the mother we want so we can accept the one we have.
Whether you’re in denial, detox or dumping the deeply painful conditioning and experiences of MDT, rest assured Great Mother (Glinda the Good Witch) is guiding and supporting you too. Subscribe for more and be blessed.